Yesterday, I spoke about Singlehood and wanted to continue with that thought. I stressed about how being single shouldn’t be contrasted against anyone else. It should be about you. How do you start to enjoy the time to yourself? How do you find yourself? Were you ever really lost?
The goal is to find something you enjoy. This is always the hardest part, but it doesn’t have to be. The best part of enjoying singlehood is the freedom to seek answers for questions you didn’t even ask. Get out there and try things you’ve always seen or thought about doing. Try everything you possibly can. Go to places, meet people, have hard conversations, explore the world that you’ve neglected for so long. It may be lonely at first but eventually you’ll forget to be lonely.
This has to go beyond just sitting at home and watching Netflix. Passive entertainment is great way to recharge batteries but it also leaves room for wallowing in negative thoughts. My personal rule is it should be interactive in some way. You can say you sincerely enjoy movies, but what will you do when it’s done? Do you interact with the medium or do you just watch? I have a friend that loves movies so much that she has a list of the 100 best movies of all the time and wants to decide herself if they all are as great as they seem. I recommended to her to review and turn those experiences into a blog, book, channel, or even social group to watch with other movie fans.
Did you always think Salsa dancing was cool? Always enjoyed watching extreme sports? Want to travel somewhere new? Do you love animals? Want to learn to paint? Lose ten pounds? Why not start today? How would you like to do it? Seriously set out and try any activity until you find something that you enjoy. Eventually, you will forget to be lonely.
Note: There is a difference between difficulty and displeasure. New things are naturally hard but after that initial barrier of the first few tries, if it is still laborious to do, move on to something else.
I respect those of you that believe you want to pour all your excess time into your work, but I advise against it. Finding yourself should be about what makes your life worth living, not somebody’s net worth. You are more than a paycheck and nobody’s life should solely revolve around making money. Having a job/career you enjoy is a great privilege that many people do not have but it should never define your personhood.
I recommend doing something that you can build on over time with tangible results. I started writing this blog in search of something. I started working out to improve on what I saw in the mirror. I started reading the bible to understand more. I can look back over the last 6 months and see evidence of my progress. I am well over 100 posts since I restarted my blog. I have gained 10 lbs of muscle since September. I speak and think differently than I did months ago. I know I’m different and that positive change motivates me.
I continuously talk about change and my personal goals. But, the biggest change is that I’ve been enjoying my personal development and the goals I’ve met so much that I have a hard time giving that time up for other things and people. I’m loving the man I’m becoming and it’s all because I decided to do something I love.
What are some things you always thought about trying or admiring in someone else? What haven’t you done before? What are your hobbies or passion projects? Pick one and let me know about it. Leave them in the comments below.